Be forewarned. This is not a happy entry. I miss my grandmother. Every single day, I miss her. Today's an especially hard day for some reason. It goes back and forth like that. I know it's selfish to want her back, but I really can't help it today. Today, I need her. I need to be able to go sit at her kitchen table and hear her voice. Hear her encouragement. Hear she's praying for me and feel it. She was such a tangible source of God's love for me. I know he loves me even though she's not here, but it was always easier to grasp it when she was.
I love her so much, and today I need her.
Enough time has passed that some days I barely think about it, then other days I feel like I can't breathe it hurts so much...grief is weird. What do you think she would say to you right now if she read this blog entry??? I don't know the answer. I just wonder what she would say...from her new and incredible perspective.
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She'd say, "Sara Anne, don't you wish for me! I'm where I'm supposed to be, and one day soon you all will be with me." But I don't like being on this side of waiting...
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